General

Speculation on last Friday’s court appearance from the mind of a Vanguard

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by
Frank Parlato
Frank Parlato

By Dirk Nelson

Well, as it turns out, last Friday’s court appearance was not a total disaster for Keith Alan Raniere formerly known asThe Vanguard” now known as Federal Prisoner #57005-177 (By the way, the Feds included “The Vanguard” in the title for his pending criminal case).

A few things didn’t go exactly as he hoped:

– His top slave-women, Allison Mack, showed up but refused to acknowledge him. That’s cold – especially for someone who previously promised “eternal devotion and obedience” to him.

What the hell kind of slave is this?”

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– His request for a “speedy trial” – which would have meant that the trial would have started sometime in June or July – was turned down by the judge because Allison, his co-defendant, had already waived that right and he’s bound by her decision.

Who put Allison in charge of my life?”

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– The judge indicated that he was very unlikely going to consider any kind of bail package for Raniere – which means he’ll be residing at MDC until the start of his trial, which is now scheduled to start on October 1.

Doesn’t the judge understand that I haven’t had any vegetarian pizza with hot sauce for more than a month now? Isn’t that, like, cruel and unusual punishment?”

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Assistant US Attorney Moira Penza announced that the Feds are planning to issue a superseding indictment – and that it will contain additional charges and additional defendants.

“Uh oh, you mean the Feds found out about some of my other crimes?”

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Toni Natalie, the woman that Raniere has been harassing for the past 20-years was there and enjoyed seeing the man who had raped and harassed her in his prison-issued brown onesie.

“Has she forgotten that I’m the smartest man in the world?”

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Frank Report