Kim Snyder is not happy.
In fact, one could describe her as angry. It was bad enough, hard enough, to have lost her sister to the Nxivm cult some 16 years ago.
Her sister, Kristin Marie Snyder, disappeared on February 6, 2003 after being thrown out of a Nxivm class in Anchorage, Alaska – and is listed as a “presumptive suicide.” Her body was never found – and the criminal leader of the Nxivm cult, Keith Raniere, had ample motive to murder her.
But what Kim is angry about now is not about her sister – that makes her sad and pensive. Instead, her anger is directed to a woman who has inserted herself into her family’s story and, by all accounts, lied about it as well.
In her book, Toni Natalie tells the story of Kristin Snyder with some embellishments that were quite hurtful to the family.
The Lies of Toni Natalie
Toni – in order to be the one who gets to tell the Snyder story to the media, on talk shows, and in her book, “The Program Inside the Mind of Keith Raniere and the Rise and Fall of Nxivm,” – has told people she is the Snyder family spokesperson.
She told the family she was doing this because she cared about them and sought to protect them. She promised she would tell the story in her book.
In her book, Toni wrote that the Snyder family knew Kristin was unstable and possibly suicidal before she disappeared. Toni published this dreadful lie: that Kristin Snyder called her parents and told them crazy things like that she, Kristin, was responsible for the implosion of the space shuttle Columbia, and her parents did nothing.
When Kim and her mother read the book, they were shocked. They cut off connection with Toni. They blocked her from contacting them by phone.
That rebellion against Toni led to Kim making calls to Nxivm-related people and she found out something even more shocking. For the first time, Kim learned some of the things that Toni had told other people about her.
What she found out was almost as hurtful as the lie Toni put in her book about how her parents had got the suicidal warning signals from Kristin – but did nothing to help her.
What Kim found out was that Toni told people that Kristin Snyder’s mother was aged and infirm and that Kristin’s sister, Kim, was ‘mentally retarded” and/or had the intellect and maturity of an 8-year-old.
It worked too
I personally witnessed it.
Time and time again, I was contacted by media members about the Snyder story – and asked what I knew about it since I was first to report that Kristin Snyder was claiming to be pregnant with Keith Raniere’s child before she disappeared. Those media members who had spoken to Toni first – before they contacted me – told me they knew they could not speak to the family – for after all – Kim Snyder is mentally disabled and but a child emotionally and the mother is almost senile – as Toni seems to have told them.
I remember a few of them expressed disdain at the thought of attempting to reach Kim and interview her. “She can’t be allowed on camera. That would be unethical,” they said, virtually parroting Toni.
I was busy with other stories – more current – about Raniere – his arrest – his trial, etc. I let it pass for two years. Then, after Raniere’s conviction, I wanted to return to the subject of the disappearance of Kristin Snyder. I contacted Toni – who said she represented the Snyders – and asked her to ask them to let me speak with them.
She said, “No. Frank, you know Kim is retarded and the mother is old. They don’t want to hear from you or anyone.”
“But I have new information,” I said. “I have evidence that Kristin Snyder may not have committed suicide but was possibly murdered.”
“Kim is not competent to even understand and the mother is old,” Toni said.
I had to accept Toni’s judgment. She represented the family, she said. She was close to them. And initially, my calls to Kim were not returned. In fact, Kim sent me a text and referred me to Toni.
Then things changed
As mentioned above, Toni published her book and the Snyder’s read it – and there was the despicable lie – in Toni’s book – something Toni chose to put in there without checking with the Snyder family: That Kristin Snyder called her family in South Carolina – she up in Alaska – and gave them the necessary warning sign – the cry for help – that she was “raving maniacally” as Toni wrote it – blaming herself for an explosion in space of the Columbia – and the parents ignored it. Just sat back and did nothing.
Kristin Snyder
At least that’s what Toni wrote.
In reality, Kim and her parents say they never got such a call. The last time they had seen or heard from Kristin, she was stable and cheerful. She was pleased with her new Nxivm classes – and she exhibited no signs of instability.
As Kim told Frank Report, “If she had made that call, they would have taken the next plane to Alaska.”
What was Toni’s motive then for telling the lie about Kristin calling home and revealing she was disturbed – to apathetic parents?
We may never know.
Toni now admits it was false, but blames it on her “researchers” at Grand Central Publishing and her assistant, Chet Hardin, who co-wrote the book.
And Toni has offered to make it right by correcting the lie – that Chet and Grand Central Publishing made – in the second edition of her book.
But that is not enough for Kim. After all, there may never be a second edition.
Kim also wants to know why Toni told everyone she is retarded
Kim gets it – that Toni wanted to “own” the Kristin Snyder story – but she doesn’t understand why Toni would tell people that Kim is retarded. Kim says she was very hurt when she learned about that.
Perhaps it was a way of marginalizing Kim to people before they spoke with her – so, if she called – they would distance themselves – they would understand she is not incompetent.
And perhaps Toni wanted to own the story herself and get the family exclusively on camera or audio for her podcast. She could do the best job of telling the story, no doubt.
But for the fact that Toni wanted herself and her assistant, Chet, to stay in the same guest bedroom in the Snyder house, Kim says – which her mother could not condone because they are not married – Toni would have already been down to South Carolina and would have already recorded Kim and her mother for her podcast.
Which Lie Is Worse?
I think that Toni’s twin lies are what makes Kim so unhappy.
Lie #1: That Kristin reached out to her family while she highly agitated and unstable – and they ignored her.
Lie #2: That Toni – to safeguard the story for herself – told many people that Kim is retarded and has the mental capacity of an 8-year-old.
Toni Is Like a Stolen Valor Vulture
In a sense, Toni is the equivalent of those people who put on military medals they did not earn – the term for this is “stolen valor”. Toni is the stolen valor vulture of Nxivm. But that is another story for another day: How Toni conflated her heroism and lied about her fight and the extent of her victimhood by Raniere and company, etc..
For purposes of this story, Kim has asked me to clear the air about her NOT being retarded.
She is insistent I publish details about her and help her put an end, if I can, to Toni’s narrative that Kim is retarded.
So here goes:
High School Diploma
First of all, Kim has something Toni does not have: Kim has a high school diploma.
What Kim and Toni have in common is that they both have a son.
Toni gave up her son – when he was 9. She claims she gave him up to his father because of the horrors and tortures of Keith Raniere. Most mothers would not give up their son – but would give up the boyfriend. But Toni stayed with Keith after she abandoned her son. And even after Toni left Keith, she never went back to being part of her son’s life. His father raised him solely.
Toni describes this in her book as her huge sacrifice.
Kim also has a son – and unlike Toni – she raised him alone – without the father. She never got child support and never abandoned him for any man.
Toni Natalie told the Snyder family she wanted to look out for them.
Kim Reads and Writes – Toni Can’t
Kim has another advantage over Toni. She can read – and write as well.
Toni admits she cannot read – she blames it on what she describes as severe dyslexia. “The words just swim off the pages,” Toni says.
But Kim has good reading comprehension – and in conversation uses words like “appalling”, “disdain”, and “pithing” [I had to look up pithing – it means to break the spinal cord – and Kim meant it in a figurative sense – that that is what Toni does with people].
So how do you disprove a lie?
Maybe the best way to help Kim get rid of Toni’s defamation is to let her tell her own story. I will share, with Kim’s permission, some of her texts to me.
For those of you who think this is much ado about nothing, try to remember that this is a woman who has been hurt – hurt by the loss of her sister, hurt by the fact that her sister’s body was never found, hurt by lies – told by Raniere – about her father – and later lies by Natalie [two peas in a pod].
She is perhaps a little too eager to explain she is not, as Toni told people, “retarded” and that she is not the equivalent of an 8-year-old.
But I will give her the benefit of the doubt and publish her texts as she sent them- in order.
So here are Kim’s texts to me. [From here on in, when I make a comment it will be in brackets and bold.]
Kim’s Texts:
There are SO many issues that have to be clarified – but the name-calling [by Toni] and NOT telling me she called me “retarded?” Gee! How low can you stoop????
[After reading my story, Snyder Family Condemns Toni Natalie for Lie She Told in Her Book About Kristin Snyder, Kim texted] “Thank you for all that you are doing! Man! I love it!!!!! This is what I have wanted the whole time!!!! Thank you for giving mom & me our voices – and for giving Kris a voice from the grave!! !!!!!!!!! I, now, feel vindicated!!!!!!! This will refute her whole story!!!!!”
Yes!!!!!! People need to know that her story on us is bogus!!!!! Wow! I am NOT retarded – now, people know that!…. I am NOT a retarded 8 year old!!!!!!
I would like for the lawyers and our entire team to see ALL of these lies!!!!! They are very hurtful.
Kim Snyder has had a struggle in life but she disputes she is retarded. Toni Natalie says otherwise.
[Kim works with veterans and makes veterans’ flag bracelets. She has done this for years. Her bracelets have been shipped around the world. Kim goes on in her texts:]
The lies that Toni has told on me – she can’t repair! She has done SO much damage, but fortunately, the VA, Judge, Golden Corral [who helps sponsor her charity], and the other Veterans, are NOT going to allow – Toni to hurt me!!! The pain is done!
The name-calling – is childish – and she never said to me that I was retarded! That was all done behind my back. Long story short – her story is NOT worth armadillo crap!
I have done parties for my parents, done military celebrations, that I have on DVD!!!!! Gee!!!! She can’t win this story!!!!!
My story is very much worth doing a story on …. I have even done a newscast in Washington, DC. All of these reports are on paper.
[Continuing to try to dispute Toni, Kim explains she is competent to do the work needed to promote her veterans’ flag bracelet project – and help at military funerals. Sure, Kim is pressing hard to defend herself. Perhaps this is caused by the freshness of the hurt.]
I have military music from country music artists…..3 book fulls!!!!! My files are full of veteran charts, celebrations…..my work hours, etc.
I have SO many things that I continue to do. I carry a military briefcase everywhere that I go, and a roller bag, full of work stuff, when we go on vacation. I don’t relax!!!!! LOL- I do need a new briefcase!!!!!
I have hotels that work with me – at the beach, with the flag Bracelet Project – but, bottom line, there are 15-20,000 flag bracelets out there – all over the world!!!!!!
Pearl Harbor has my bracelets….and they put up a photo of dad – gee- I’m retarded??????
I did everything for my sister’s funeral, and for my dad’s. How dare she call me names……and not have any evidence!!!!!!!
How can she have any room to refute my story????? She can’t!!!!!!
[Kim was told by Toni that she was going to appear on Dr. Oz, Dr. Phil, Dateline and elsewhere to tell the story and Toni, saying she wanted to protect the Snyder family, said she would handle the victim impact statement that the Snyder family wanted to send to Raniere’s sentencing judge.]
Dr. Oz? The lawyers????? Who else? Dateline????? Gee – I want to see those programs.
I wrote ALL of the NFL teams, told them about my father, and the flag bracelet project, and they sent jerseys and team items. We have 25 NFL jerseys!!!!!
Andy [her son] has his PAPA’s [Kim’s father’s] items [medals etc.] ……so, you can’t refute any of this!!!!!!!
[Again and again, Kim texted. I could see how much this was upsetting her. She was obsessing over it – and before you side with Toni on this – perhaps you might consider what you would do – if you lost your sister – and a woman came into your life – saying she was your new sister – that she cared about you – and was the only one who did not want to profit off the story – that she would protect you from the vultures of Nxivm – and the opportunists in the media who want to exploit you – then she exploits you – and in order to keep others away – tells everyone you are retarded.
[And you hear this from numerous people – not just one or two – after you make inquiries – they all say the same thing: ‘Toni told me you were retarded’ – and maybe – maybe, if you had challenges in your life – and fought to be alive even – maybe you too would overreact – and obsess yourself.
[So Kim continued to text – and text – and the texts – as well as her phone conversations – did not reveal to me a mentally retarded person.]
It’s funny that I am SO retarded – that I am known to the Wedding Salon in New York, Kleinfeld’s! The lady that handles my flag bracelets, her name is Dorothy. I have an autographed photo and a beautiful headband from them.
I am also known to NASA – Reagan Library. I have an autographed book – from Michael Reagan. SO – I’m Retarded? These issues refute Toni’s story about me.
[Kim also felt she had to explain she is a competent mother.]
I make sure my son gets up in the A.M. – gets ready for school, then mom & I take him to & from the Presbyterian/Baptist school – we run the dog with the 4 wheeler – we come in, homework time, VA work time- supper, and bed time.
When Andy is at school, it is VA time and flag Bracelet time. 8-9 hours. When Andy goes to bed- then, I can work on anything that I need to finish.
I am a full-time mom & VA volunteer. I do what needs to be done for the VA ceremonies, and try to take the work off of people. I stand with the team – during the ceremonies, and make sure, the clean up is done after.
I go to Florence, SC – and hand out 3-500 flag bracelets to our Veterans there – and that is the Nov. 11th free meals for them. We return to Dillon- and attend the “Salute to Our Veterans” Ceremony.
By the 3rd week in November, and the beginning weeks in December, things are shutting down for the holidays – December 15 – January 3rd. Andy is out ALL that time – so, it is shopping time, closing charts time. I turn in my Chart – as to how many hours that I have worked- and then, it is my time!!!!!!
We do the grocery shopping – when needed – when we pick Andy up, and we come home. We attend Andy’s soccer games – during that season, but I still do all of the other things that are above!!!!!!
Toni can’t refute any of my story now. None of it!!!!!!!!
I have built dad a full military corner in the computer room – all of his things – I have built him a shrine in my room – he was a Marine – not a US Air Force soldier!!!!!! I honor him every day!!!!! So – do you have enough to work with???? To refute her story???????
Thank you!
[A little later Kim texted again.]
I left out – I am Dillon County’s Volunteer beauty queen.
The other thing – I have fought Aggressive Breast Cancer – stage 3- had a double mastectomy – 2 major breast surgeries – and 48 rounds of chemo. NO – I don’t have a chest – so what?- I am alive.
Toni didn’t know any of this stuff – I want to squash any thoughts of me being retarded!!!!!! Is this enough?
[A little later]
I, after having chemo- got infection in my mouth, had to have all of my teeth pulled, and now, I have implants and snap-in dentures. I don’t have facial hair, because of the chemo. I am alive!!!!!!! I beat Cancer!!!!!!!!!!
Do we have enough to stop her???????
[And again]
I am a Jefferson Award winner – for the state of South Carolina – for 2017: Outstanding Community Service. I have letters from Queen Elizabeth – everyone on TV supports me – The Little Couple, Dr. Pimple Popper, etc. SO- are we able to refute her lies at all?
[And again]
To let you know – If I am SO retarded – I cook for my family, and clean up – I volunteer with the DCS schools, our church, etc.
I take my own showers, decide what I am going to wear. I also go to my own doctor’s appointments- take the meds that I am assigned to.
Retarded? Ha!
I wanted you to know- there have been times, that, I have wondered why I was on the earth – yes, times of complete desperation – but I know now – I am here for: mom, Andy, Justice for Kris, and our Veterans.
There have been times, in cooking – that a memory may flood through, and I have cried – but I want Keith Raniere to feel all of this. He needs to own it.
The feelings of being completely alone – washes over me – all the time!!!!!!!
I work 24/7- the volunteer job for the Veterans is ALL the time!!!!! As I said, I even take work with me, on vacation.
My appetite – little to none. My mom is very concerned about me. I like iced tea – I have to have caffeine ALL the time.
Am I depressed? Yes!!!!!! Am I putting on a fake smile? Yes!!!!! Will I ever be happy again????? No!!!!!
My father went to his grave, wondering what happened to his baby [Kristin] – and with the false allegation [made by Keith] in his heart.
Guess what? My Heroes are gone!!!!! One was taken from me, for NO reason, and the other – because it was God’s timing!!!!! The pain never goes away. To be called a retarded citizen is cruel, and I now understand what my father felt.
Everyone that I have ever gotten close to, has died suddenly. I have had a rough life. Will I quit? NO!!!!!! I want this murder [of her sister] solved!!!!!!
My father was my hero — I am at a loss as to how to keep going. With family, and God’s Grace – but I know my sister was murdered!!!!!
How do we prove this??
The pain in my heart- I will NOT allow it to destroy me- but there has to be some consequence for Toni’s behavior. She is destroying a lot of lives. The lies —not telling me about the book tour, the lies about [her dog] Raymona [Toni told Kim a completely different story than the one Toni relates in her book]; the boyfriends [and husbands, Toni lies about] – the false excuse as to why she couldn’t come. The big thing of [Toni] wanting to do a book signing in Florence, SC. That will never happen!!!!!!!
I did graduate from Dillon High School——yes, I went back an extra year, to get my diploma——- but, I still got it!!!!!!
My bracelets are at ACE Hardware in Dillon…. The other place that has my bracelets: Designs by Marlene – in Dillon…. Cooper funeral home in Dillon has the flag bracelets… Now, I will have my bracelets at Norton’s Barbecue, of Latta, SC. That is a million-dollar operation….
Our new parish is in Florence, SC- Fr. Noel P. Tria. I have yet to talk to him about my project, and the deacon as well. I have to do that before Veterans Day. Am sure it will work!!!!!!!!
I do for people what has to be done- I make brownies and food for families, for funerals, and for fundraisers.
We travel with my project – as it affords. I work hard at everything I try to do.
I think I have refuted Toni’s stories!!!!!! I have more to tell you later. I have sent you a lot today.
[The next day Kim continued to text and, by this time, perhaps some readers find them tedious. I did not. I felt she needed to express herself fully. This was not just Toni’s lies about her – that she was retarded and an incompetent child mentally – who did not deserve the respect of being treated like an adult with worth and value – but it was also the pent up grief of losing her sister 16 years ago to a monstrous cult – never finding her body or knowing what happened – and then how Keith Raniere spread lies about her father – to discredit him – and then the long years of struggle with health – while clinging to her son – never abandoning him.
[I realized, as I read her texts, that the monster was not really Toni – she is just an interloper – the monster is Raniere. And that Kim Snyder has to get this said and in print – at least once in her life.]
I Love Teddy bears – but the one that means so much to me – is dad’s Marine Corps Bear. I took it to the funeral. I miss my HERO!!!!!!
Toni reached mom this evening, using a blocked number, and told her to use a tea block, to go on your web site, so, you wouldn’t know that she had been there, reading the article that you wrote on us today. [Frank Report has had more than 5 million views this year and I never try to find out who views the website, nor have I the time.]
I listened very intently, on how destructive she is of you.
She also told mom – she didn’t want to call & hurt me. Gee – she is telling that she never said, I was retarded. Wow! People are just going to make things up? NOT!!!!!!! [Quite a few people told Kim what Toni said], She told mom it was a horrific day today, reading all the untrue things that were written about her.
She used an unlisted number to call mom – but she said she was so shocked at all the terrible things that have been said about her….. She is trying to act innocent!!!!!!
The other thing we need to hear is what you found in Anchorage. Please!!!!!! Let’s discuss that!!!!!…. I will see this investigation to the end!!!!!!! I will NOT walk away!!!!!!
I hate Toni for what she has tried to make me keep quiet. Thank you for all of your work!!!!!! I will keep working with you!!!!!!!
I need Heidi here, [Heidi Hutchinson volunteered to visit her in SC. – not for any media purpose or to make money off of her story – but because they have something in common – they both lost sisters to Nxivm]…. [Toni] was heard to say [to her mother], She didn’t want to upset me. Gee – that has already been done!!!!!!!
Mom said we will NOT continue communication with her!!!!!! She has an axe to grind!!!! ….
Left a message for Tanya Hajjar- [the Assistant US Attorney who was one of the prosecutors in the case against Raniere] … and told her she needs to get our victim’s impact statements [away] from Toni – and that Toni has told everyone that I am retarded. I am sick of this! This is very hurtful!!!!!!
[Once – and this happened to me as well – once a person realizes that Toni is likely a pathological liar – a woman who probably really needs mental help – you start to check everything she says. Kim began to feel this way now too. She texted me, evidently doing a little research about Toni and her yarn about her brother’s death – which Toni claims was a suicide caused by Keith Raniere].
Very interesting! I have Toni’s brother’s obituary in front of me – I printed it out. Memorials can be sent to the American Heart Association. Gee – says her brother died suddenly – gee, then – memorials – to go to the American Heart Association.
Doesn’t that tell people something? His heart gave out. Keith had nothing to do with this. Wow! That is really a story!!!!!
I have talked to [Albany Times Union reporter] Brendan Lyons – the obituary for Toni’s brother – Keith wasn’t in her life then – 2009 – the obit – says she was with Scott. No heroin overdose! He had heart problems!!!!!!!…. Why blame it on Keith? She was with Scott Foley according to the obit!!!!!!
[As further and perhaps final proof that Kim is not retarded and is not like an eight-year-old, Kim sent me more than 130 photos and letters from people she met or exchanged greetings with – with her veterans flag bracelet program. I do not have space to put all the letters and photos in – but here is a sampling.]
So, readers who have come this far with me, I hope you will not be too displeased for my choice to give this space to Kim Snyder.
I think she deserves to have a voice in the Nxivm story.
Despite Toni and a few others who like to claim they are the greatest victims of Nxivm – I submit that Kim – having actually lost a sister trumps Toni any day of the year – not only in being a victim – but trumps her in intelligence, honest, and class.
I leave it to readers to judge the rightness of my decision to publish this story at Kim’s request.
