In our exploration of the juryless family court system, FR looks at a contentious case involving Matthew Lodice, a building contractor, and Theodora Antar, a law student at the University of Connecticut.
Unending Battle: The Custody Case of A.L.
Lodice and Antar were never married and never lived together.
They were co-workers, and Antar “became pregnant with A.L. unexpectedly in September 2018.” The child was born in May 2019. She is now four years, five months.
Antar at first had primary custody, but Lodice actively involved himself in the child’s life.
From when A.L. was about six months old, there was contention between them. Antar sued Lodice in a dispute over child support, and they have been fighting in one court or another ever since.
In 2022, Antar stepped through the doors of the family court and filed an emergency ex-parte motion for custody before Judge Jane Grossman. It backfired. Judge Grossman granted custody to the father. Antar is now allowed only supervised visitation at the discretion of Lodice.
She has not seen her child in more than two months.
Theodora Antar
A Web of Accusations
In response, Antar filed a sweeping RICO lawsuit against Lodice, Judge Grossman, and over 300 other individuals, including an extensive list of court professionals and members of her own family.
Her allegations include fraud, conspiracy to commit fraud, abuse of process, and violations of the Federal Racketeer Influenced and Corrupt Organizations Act.
Antar claims Lodice and Judge Grossman colluded to strip her of her parental rights and claims Lodice unlawfully prevented her from seeing or contacting their daughter.
According to her amended complaint, Antar is not only suing Lodice and the officials as mentioned above but also Lodice’s:
father,
mother,
stepfather,
ex wife,
son,
girlfriend
two brothers,
sister-in-law,
ex-sister-in-law
brother’s brother-in-law
business,
customers of his business
subcontractor of his business
partner in his business
friend
ex-landlord
police officers who refused to arrest Lodice based on Antar’s complaints
police departments that refused to arrest him based on Antar’s complaints: New Britain Police Department, Waterbury Police Department, Middlebury Police Department, Wallingford Police Department, New Haven Police Department, Woodbridge Police Department, Orange Police Department and Milford Police Department –all refused to arrest Lodice
Lodice’s Side of the Story
To date, we have yet to hear anything from the father, Matthew Lodice.
In the following opinion editorial, Lodice offers his perspective on this complex and emotionally charged battle with the mother of his daughter.
By Matthew Lodice
I am the father of A.L. –Theodora Antar’s little girl.
First, I will say my daughter is finally safe from the abuse of her mother. There is a clear distinction between facts and fiction.
I encourage anyone curious or concerned about our case to download the transcripts from the court proceedings.
From there, you will see the facts and why Ms. Antar lost custody of our daughter.
Also, all police reports are a matter of public record.
Ms. Antar has psychological issues that are not being managed. It is the state’s job to determine what is in the child’s best interest and make decisions based on that, not on what people are feeling or wishing. Facts matter. Here are some facts:
Since our split, Ms. Antar has been doing everything she can to try to ruin my life. In doing so, it skewed her better judgment and started significantly hurting our child.
Ms. Antar has contacted every immediate family member of mine, friends and acquaintances, and potential love interest.
Ms. Antar has sent hate messages and threatening messages. She’s even sent pornographic images and videos that she and I shared while dating – to my mother, father, family, and friends.
None of my family or friends ever responded with anything hateful back.
She has messaged people I haven’t talked to in over 20 years just because they have commented on pictures and stuff I posted.
Friends don’t even want to pose in pictures with me anymore for fear of her retaliation.
She has contacted people I’ve dated since her and harassed them.
She’s even gone as far as contacting where they work, saying anything she could to get them in trouble.
She has filed 15 protective orders against me in four jurisdictions. All were found false and denied.
We must still appear before a judge for the seven new protective orders she recently filed. She has filed 20 contempt motions. All were found false.
She has filed nine ex parte emergency custody motions. All were found false and denied.
Family Court Judge Jane Grossman awarded custody to Matthew Lodice.The system is not against her at all.
The facts of the case are what’s against her.
My oldest son babysits our daughter regularly when I have work or engagements. Ms. Antar didn’t want him to do this. So he became a target of her attacks. She has made four allegations of sexual abuse against him towards my daughter. After two forensic interviews and four detective investigations, with DCF involved, they were all found false and done in retaliation.
Not being satisfied, she took our daughter to have a rape kit done on her, which was negative. Imagine that. Imagine your four-year-old girl subjected to a rape kit based on her mother’s delusions.
She even left a fake review of my son at work, leading to his termination.
We knew the review was fake because it was at the wrong location and falsely identified my son’s job description. But his employer said the backlash from her was too much of a risk for them to keep him.
She has tried to sue me and my company.
Ms. Antar is currently on supervised visits and supervised phone calls only. She continues to harass my family and me by constantly sending the police to do “wellness checks” at our home.
Think about it.
Do you believe every judge in multiple jurisdictions, every DCF employee, every police officer and detective, every children’s hospital and pediatrician, and everyone in her and my own family are all trying to make Theodora’s life difficult?
We all want what’s in the best interest of our daughter.
Ms. Antar is now facing trial for filing a false report and disorderly conduct. It is the second time police have charged her for filing a false report against me.
Both times, police arrested her, and she called the cops.
The disorderly conduct charge is because she harassed my children and me during a visitation exchange with our daughter.
I encourage anyone to go to the Orange Police Department, New Haven Police Department, Woodbridge Police Department, or Waterbury Police Department to review police reports.
Antar was arrested at her daughter’s pediatrician’s office.
She was also recently arrested for violating the protective order I have against her for showing up at our daughter’s doctor’s appointment. She was told multiple times not to be there by the doctor’s office and by myself.
Ms. Antar has not seen our daughter in two months because she refuses to follow the court order and do supervised visitation. She demands that A.L. be brought to her immediately upon request, without supervision.
Two weeks ago, I was arrested for interfering with an officer and risk of injury. The reason this happened was because Ms. Antar spoke with our daughter during one of their phone calls. Our daughter claimed her butt hurt her from not wiping well since she wipes herself.
Ms. Antar called the police and said A.L. was being molested at my house again. When the police came, they came with many units demanding I open the door so that they could have the medics and police come into our home, strip down my daughter, and subject her to have her private parts checked again.
Upon refusal, they forced entry, arrested me, and took my daughter to the hospital. She was cleared at the hospital again, and allegations were found false, and she was sent back home to us the same night.
I’ve since terminated phone calls between my daughter and Ms. Antar until the court addressed these issues.
She hasn’t paid one child support payment since I’ve taken over custody. She claims to be unemployed and have no income, and at the same time claims to have $1,700 a week in bills. Her financial affidavits are public record.
The allegations she made about me drinking and driving with my children are false. It’s just something she says. She is willing to say and do anything to make our lives a living hell.
All we and anyone want is for her to be a good mom and be there for our daughter. Just to leave everyone alone and focus on what she needs to focus on.
This is just some of what has been going on. There are so many other things Ms. Antar has done to many people. Anyone who has ever dated her in the past couple of years has faced retaliation from her once that relationship ended, especially litigiously.
Though the court system has flaws, it is not corrupt against Ms. Antar. It has just listened to the facts from both sides and has been doing what is in our daughter’s best interest.
My daughter is doing so much better now. She is happy and well-adjusted. She is learning so much while growing and getting better every day. All I care about is the well-being of my children, and I will continue to do so.
